Full Circle!

FULL CIRCLE…
by Tess M.

                As fall season slowly comes to an end, I am once again reminded of how fast time flies.  It seems like it was only yesterday when I was saying goodbye to family and friends in Manila, and yet I believe after this month, it will be my second Christmas away from home.  It has been a year and two months to be exact. I have come more than "full circle"

                So fast is the changing of the seasons, I hardly recognize that  I and my husband have successfully survived our first year as married couple.  Shame! I have barely mastered my cooking skills, and yet, by tradition, here we are officially  “honeymooners no more”.  As disappointing as the latter may sound, I heard a word of consolation from my husband's Best Man who  told us that our first year anniversary marked a milestone in our matrimonial life. He explained that first year is monumental in every union for it can be the most difficult part of newly wed’s adjustment. It was different from what I heard from Filipino married friends who said it was actually the “seven years itch” that is indeed challenging, but hearing it from a man who has been divorced twice, I guess I am not in the position to neither object nor argue his conclusion.

                When I was still single and, so to speak, on the verge of combined confusion and  uncertainty whether  God’s final verdict for me would  be to become  a religious celibate nun and or ordinary celibate layman, I decided to research about possible causes of marriage breakdowns as my topic for my thesis in my graduate studies. As a Development Communication major, I defended my rationale for choosing such topic by arguing that development comes from a progressive society. However, we cannot expect a developing culture to move forward when broken homes and unhappy family continue to negatively affect our children: the moral fiber of our society.  My argument was accepted and my research topic was approved.  However, unknown to anybody, and what I didn’t reveal until this time was, besides my noble intention of “preserving family”, I was unceasingly begging God for His mercy to find me a husband, so I would not die celibate after all. Faith never fails, it worked!

                The results of my research study disclosed that many couples surprisingly ended up in separation, despite their strong love for each other, because of reasons such as wrong definition of marriage and lack of knowledge and or ability to make a relationship.  During my survey I finally confirmed that majority of single men and women have almost the same criteria in finding a partner. Education and financial stability are among top in the list.  Although I learned enormously from said research work, I still fully accredit my success of finding my wonderful husband to God’s miraculous work. I realized that no matter how much I plan my life, only God has the power to make my aspirations happen: I can prepare, I can act, I can pray, but only God can answer!

                I have come full circle.  From my role as a former spinster-researcher who was privy on why marriages break down, I have finally come to my chance to make mine – my answered prayer – whole and everlastingly happy. Although I understand that we are just starting our journey and still have a long way to go, I am confident that with God’s grace, the best is yet to come…

               

Surprise Ideas 101

Birthday Chronicles
posted by May

Birthdays are celebrated in different ways, in many ways. It was my husband's birthday and 6 days prior to his big day, I concocted a special project to make my small gift treasures stretch to what seems like "expensive days ahead". Nothing but a week-long shower of gifts and a week-long celebration of HIM alone can brighten up his busy days at work. In a marriage, except ourselves (the wives), there's also the husbands who, without voicing it out, have simple materialistic needs that are shoved to the back because wives' needs alone cost too much, how much more with theirs added?

So with a budget of $100 and the poetry in my head, I carefully planned ERIC'S TREASURE HUNT. The hunt was consisted of 5 poems & puzzles that lead to the teenie treasures. I posted photos and prices so you can get the idea of how to stretch out a budget. All presents were carefully selected, I didn't rush. I made it a point that all things reflect who he is and what he loves. All poems I created.


Day 1:
A yellow balloon pops for a clue
But without luck for me you cannot see
GIve wifey 3 dimes and 3 pennies
And you can pop it free!

35 steps for a 35 year-old-hubby
Put on your big shoes and find a wifey
35 steps there will be
a buried treasure find and see.

the balloons with clue inside

Treasure hunt at night by the beach



His treasure: a Macys tree angel ornament saying "I love you this much" - $6.00



Day 2:

A red balloon comes your way
To lead you to a treasure wrapped in blue
Narrate 35 states and this gift I say
Is yours to come true

Since wifey is sick today
Buried treasure is easy to locate
Think of wifey's present in blue
That she received from hubby 2 Christmas eves

Day 2 clue carrier

his treasure: wrapped in blue (he loves cider) - $10.00


Day 3:
US presidents battle to win
A taste of the freedom or success within
Now hunt for your success with this
Recite 35 presidents, dont wear yourself too thin!

As flat as can be the world was said to be
Of course nobody believed it, though it does seem flat to me
My love is not flat but find your treasure
As simple as that




Day 3 green balloon with clue: he almost didnt get through this one



posted where he wont miss it - bathroom mirror



His "flat" treasure but full of love from me :) - $5.00


Day 4:
This bloody balloon will pop
Treats for a hubby there is no doubt
3+5 minutes down by the sea,
There you will be healthy

When you come back
Relax and hunt this little treat
Green is the color
Hidden underneath your big green treasure





3+5 minutes by the sea jogging to get to his clue




Happy "boy" got his Halloween treats: Chocolates - $ 6.00


Day 5:
Birds perch above
But not the wifey
Name 35 trees around
Then pop a blue balloon you won't be out

A treasure hunt that will soon end
Hunt this thing hanging on a thread
Covered in green you will see
Hidden is this cute little thingy

yes, we have a tree inside the house



His simple treasure: he loves books & cats so I gave him a kitty bookmark - $5.00


Day 6: THE BIG DAY
For his special birthday dinner, we had a private party, just the two of us. I cooked and prepared everything the whole day to make it look unforgettable. I baked him cupcakes, blew up more balloons and gave him a REAL present. Funny, the following night, he surprised me with a special dinner at my favorite hotel on Kauai - Hyatt Kauai. It wasn't my birthday!

the balloons

the veggies



chicken fajitas I made from my trustee cookbook



tired wifey - I fell asleep right after dinner



Cupcakes I baked: Lemon chiffon with cheese frostings. I spent $15.00



wishing and blowing: one for him, one for me

my meal at posh Hyatt hotel

Final give I gave him jeans from Macys (INC International) - $50.00. Total for everything: $97.00 + balloons. I was excitedly happy, he was ecstatic. Bliss.

Treating Myself

Posted by Olivia
I had a friend who taught me how to treat myself once in a while. Something that will not only entice my eyes but will delight my palate as well. :) A sumptuous meal!

The pasta corner with Chef Tina.

 As she said to my friend and I..." A full day to live." That is when I take note of the word "full" since that day. A question that can make my every day to be asked with "What made my day "full"?

The hotpot corner

 The chef who not only cooked the food but even served it to our table. A very fine gesture of service!

the mouthwatering roast beef..for meat lovers!

Some more meat and vegetables

lamb chop, fish, and roasted quail

SUSHI...SASHIMI..MAKI..prepared by a Japanese chef 

 It was a funny moment chatting with the Japanese chef who can not speak neither English nor Filipino. :)
But with his smile and gesture alluring us to eat more and more and more...

More seafoods...

SUGAR FREE DESSERTS CORNER...love it!

the 2nd table for DESSERTS....

the 3rd table for DESSERTS...love the mango and strawberry cheesecakes.

Add caption

My portion of the desserts! :)



At the Manila Hotel  (Olivia in white)

  A memorable dinner with a dear friend and a superb service from the chef and staff.

Fall Trends 2010

Posted by Tess - Fall Trends in Florida

Fall is known as the transition from summer to winter when not only the night comes noticeably earlier, but also when temperature slowly drops. In Western culture  fall is often  associated with harvest, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and even "melancholy" as expressed in some poetry. However, to me, who is quite new to this culture, perceives  fall in two more obvious pictures: 1) the magical transformation  of sorrounding when green leaves turn to gold, and 2) the beginning of  a nip in the air. 

Florida, being known as the "Sushine State of  America", doesn't really experience harsh weather compared to other states in the north. As a matter of fact, I find our fall temperature here a little bit a teaser. When cold snap suddenly hit us a few days ago, I immediately ramaged through my clothes thinking that it  was the end for my sleeveless shirts and open toes shoes, at least for the next few moths. However, I was wrong.  Just after I prepared my fall wardrobe for work, the temperature again has started warming up. It was like an elevator, so to speak - temperature goes up, down, up, down - until ( I was told)  we reach the month of January, when the biting cold becomes more permanent.

Now I understand why unlike other states that showcase chunky sweaters and heavy boots early on in their fall fashion, Florida people stock their shelves with cozy cardigans and corduroys. Today at work I saw some fashionable women wearing knit vest instead of oversize cable-knit sweaters. Likewise, unlike the popular knowledge that black is the color for cold temperature, this doesn't seem to apply to many Floridians - or, at least not yet. 

To freshen my fall wardrobe,  following are some of the tips I learned from my reading:

1. The color camel is hot for this season

2. Retro Silhoutes are in

3. Military is a big trend

4. Lots of  lace is fall-friendly

http://jacksonville.com/skirt/2010-09-11/story/fall-fashions-florida-style



Turn, turn, turn...

Fall Trends in Hawaii

posted by May Rogers

Hawaii is the Aloha State. Aloha to the sun every single day. But it's the BER months and here comes whale sharks, monk seals, barrels and surfable waves. Also, we welcome the chilly days of everyday. As I'm sitting here in my work corner, my feet are cold and I wear pashmina! yes, in Hawaii. I cant say this is the best month to visit Hawaii because water is cold. Although you can get cold-water swimsuit, it's just not the same as summer.

We still call it Fall months. So many wear windbreakers, light sweater and you wont believe it - UGG! I dont but many girls do. I wear flats now when I go out as opposed to thong sandals and wedges that I normally wear when I go about the city. I LOVE WEDGES!

But thongs are still a must. And as always, I'm drawn to Naughty Monkey and Nine West sandals. Also I do love sandals by Steve Madden. Except for shoes which pretty much rule my days, here are the ones I recently bought for myself. I love chunky accessories so other than buying for TG, I spend some time looking for my own accessories. I'm a sucker for bangles, charm bracelets and dangles. Read my fashion blog: May's Heels




thongs by Nine West





Quilt purse by ASOS

    


9k gold chunky bracelet (also available in Trendygirls)




ah...and my favorite 10k gold bangle :) :) :)



On Making Dreams Come True

One Black Saturday
Posted by Tess

Growing up as a middle child (and, I suppose those who are also in the same position may relate), I have always been an independent person. I believe in the concept of proactive, and that goes without saying, that most of the time I don't wait for things to happen to me; I MAKE things happen.   

I remember it was one Black Saturday (of all days), I decided to spend it with a friend in a studio. As a religious practice, I understand that I was expected to be in total solemnity and prayer on this special day - the least simply staying at home if not joining the church tradition. However, believing that the real essence of  said ocassion is "love" indeed, I decided to go and celebrate it in my own special way.   

I and my friend were already at the studio as early as two in the afternoon. While the set, lights, and camera were being prepared by the photographer, my friend could no longer hide her excitement. She kept on smiling at me for no reason at all,  while obviously I was feeling uneasy. A lot of things were running through my mind, but mostly about  how  would I project  infront of the camera.  Heaven knows I never thought of being a model in my life, although I won't deny that I admire their pictures in magazines and bill boards. I tried to imagine all those poses I saw from models in the runway and tried to internalize the role. Oh boy, it was hard!

When it was finally my turn to stand up infront and give my winning pose, I felt a sudden rush of  combined feelings of  nervousness and excitement. I was very conscious of the lens following my every move. The first few minutes didn’t become easy for me nor to my  photographer. It took a lot of wasted films and time before I saw my photographer smiling and giving me a thumb's up (Alleluia!), and slowly I felt  my palpitations slowing down. Only then that I started to really enjoy the process.

I realized modeling is a gift. The beauty comes even secondary. It's a talent and skill combined, which unfortunately are not included in any of my blessings. But who cares?  I realized that love begins inside of us. We have to learn to love ourselves to fully understand it. Afterall,  we cannot give what we don’t have. We cannot force to find love in another person if it’s not there. It resides in our soul; in our total being. If I waited for a modeling agency to hire me as its model, no question and no doubt that my dream would follow me to my grave. However, I don’t have to worry about that anymore because on one Black Saturday I  decided to make myself my own model, and I call it LOVING  TESS! 

             

                                           "OUR LIFE IS A GIFT TO US,

WHAT WE MAKE OF IT IS OUR GIFT TO

       THE ONE WHO GAVE IT TO US"

        - borrowed quotation

      photo from collectibes.about.com

***

Posted by May - "On Making Dreams Come True"

I never dreamed of being a shoe designer as what I partly call myself now. But I'm on my way to developing my 5th shoe this month and although I'm not big yet, it is good to see people wear what I once drew in paper. And though I cant draw, the brain matters. I'm a fan of Project Runway and many of the designers cannot sketch but they manage to create. Designing is done in many ways. I'm still learning on how to improve myself and I swear I could use a co-designer as well as Trendygirls manager but I cant afford one at the moment so I'm all-in-one (except that I do have PH sales manager, ha! there's one job title).

So the question, am I making my dreams come true? I dont know. I'm writing now which is always gonna be the love of my life. My column has famous readers and followers from TV and book writers, TV and radio shows, fashionistas, CEOs and then some. When I think my articles dont matter much, I would get an email from someone very established like publishers, designers and editors commending me of my works. So with more studying and hard work, I'd get there. Get where? I don't know. Just there.

Here's a peek of my HALF-DONE current project to be released December-January 2011. I'm still working on embellishments and color combinations that can brighten it up a bit. Any suggestions, sisters?

The Process of Shoe-producing:
1. I sketch and pick materials, details and measurements.
2. I send it out to my manufacturer.
3. They send me the base sample to approve materials, measeurements, quality.
4. I embellish, improve or redesign.
5. I order supplies for design work.
6. I resend the finished sample.
7. Branding (TG logo).
7. Manufacturing starts. (takes 3-4 weeks depending on quantity)
8. Shipping, quality controls.
9. Packaging.

I name this after my sister: "Icy Jen"

Post post post !!!

Posted by Nerd from Toronto
wasuuppp soulsisters here  :)
i just got msg from May who seems to eager to see my first post or scribble here..
personally i dont write stuff much cuz my writing is not that good.. it just giving me stress when it comes to WRITING..  so i just read you guys' threads, and leave short comments if i hav ... yeah that's about it.. nothing more or less.
guess what? and now i feel kinda my wiriting gonna get grade or score by these native speakers readers or so..

so i just tell you that i am not a writer you better not to criticize my all grammer or stucture related stuff.  im a science(cell system biology and physiology(human bio)) nerd not the english major okay? writing paper or essay things is the time when i write english and this is how i can get survived in the past 2 years in toronto here...  and if u got question about my major fields i could explain as easy as my text books do for me  :))

okay since i dropped my psychology course something about circadian rhythm of  sleep ...and that course is worth like $2000... but i dropped it without hesitation... i say i did hesitate writing this post more than dropping the course for sure..

I kinda off to test for moments  but another one is comig within 3 weeks but still got plenty of time and peace within myself now..  so overall, i feel peace and goodness no chaos in my mind, and no taking stress release medication for while ( yeah.. i do take medication not depend on too much but need it sometimes  AND i am not a  PSYcho dont get me wrong )

yeah this is about my recent things happened in toronto. i'll jsut stop here bye y'all..


Jamie (aka Nerd from Toronto) is a university student in Toronto, Canada. With a fresh outlook in youth and life, SOTC is excited to read more from her posts. Help improve her writing by leaving comments or giving writing (or life) advices to her.  - May

Book Talk

Posted by Elizabeth
I had been a pretty "adept" student since the first day I assumed the title "student" as a common noun description of myself. I loved reading. I remember going to my playmate's school library just to "read" good stuff (i.e. Rapunzel, Jack and the Beanstalk, Clifford the Big Red Dog) that could be found in that room that smelled of old books. I knew the word 'library' at the age of six (it was geeky then, not anymore these days). Ironically, I graduated from the University of the Philippines without a trace of ANY book in my collection. I had photocopied pages though and I just chucked them whenever soonest I could. I was a struggling STFAP scholar then. No money, no books.

As years passed and the number of shoes I had was raised to the nth power, I started counting the books on my shelf too. I love reading books and then (if I'm lucky), watch their film adaptations. Interestingly, I don't get out of the cinema telling everyone that the book is better than the movie or vice versa. I am biased that way...and will probably grow old and die just like that.

My most recent read is José Saramago's 'Blindness'. This is not for the weak at heart. I even found myself putting down the book every now and then just because I chose not to have awful dreams in my sleep or was in the middle of a hearty meal. But every time I put it down, I didn't have the courage of mind to resist it. It's almost borderline hypnosis. 

Imagine a world where everyone couldn’t see, does not have any government or laws, and people act based on survival instincts and not on moral standards? Can you?

Well then, if you can't and you are up for a challenge, you had better get your fingers flipping through the pages of Saramago’s magic realism. You too will get hooked. Let me know if you get a good sleep after. ;)

***

Posted by May

Oooooh, I love books and shoes! Not necessarily together. And no, I dont like to belong to a book club. But yes to SHOE CLUB (my next project).

I love the idea of a book turned into movie. I'd certainly see "Blindness" the movie but I'd skip reading the book. It's great to know I have soul sisters who are book worms! Really, really great. Since we are in the topic of books, here's a peek at the current list on my "reading project". I'd love to share the contents but I'm sure I'd bore your brains out.

On the fast track (means I read this very quickly): I'm a member of American writing clubs. I love the business sense of fashion designing. I'm not a member of any traveler group but I OBSESS to become a writer for Conde Nast Traveler. Did I say obsess? Yes, OBSESS.

 

****

Posted by May - My New Treasure

Every Friday night, my hubby and I go on a date. Weeks ago, we visited the recurring event "Hanapepe  Art Night." There's an old bookstore there with vintage books and thousands of unfamiliar ones that have been collected from years of service. I may not be on a hunt for novels but I was definitely on a hunt for poetry collection. The older, the better. I was lucky to have found this TS Elliot collection of poems. I think that most of the poems there should never have been there but they were written by a popular poet nonetheless.

My project: Poetry Library

***

Lessons from Tuesdays With Morrie
Posted by Tess

The celebration of the Halloween made me remember the book, "Tuesdays with Morrie", which I felt was the most compelling revelations I have ever encountered  about life and death.

I remember the night I finished reading the book, I thought I was going to die when I reached its last few pages --It was Morrie's last moment and not only did I cry, but I literally sobbed non-stop for the next few minutes. I couldn't breathe because my nose got clogged and my heart was filled by too much emotion. When I finally stopped, I realized that probably it's my way of grieving for the lost of Morrie -- for the man I haven't met and yet have left too much impact in my life.

I was touched by Morrie's journey with his death that I copied some of the memorable lines from his book that struck me, and I want to share them with you. I think they are worth learning...

 

Lessons  from “Tuesdays with Morrie”

1. "Do I wither up and disappear, or do I make the best of my best time left?"

2. "I’m on the last great journey here – and people want to me to tell them what to pack"

3. "Life is a series of  pulls back and forth. Like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle.”

4. "Love wins. Love always wins."

5. "Cocoon human activities include conversation, interaction, and affection."

6. "There are two things to be sad over: dying and living an unhappy life."

7. "Many people  walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they’re busy doing things they think are important. This is because they’re chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."

8. "If you really want it, then you’ll make your dream happen."

9.  "Is this what comes at the end? Maybe death is the great equalizer, the one big thing that can finally make strangers shed a tear for one another."

10.  "The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in. Love is the only rationale act."

11.  “It’s horrible to watch my body slowly wilt  away nothing. But it’s also wonderful because of all the time I get to say good-bye.”

12.  "Our time was running out, I have to do something." (oh this line really made me cry for reason I couldn’t explain)

13.  “You closed your eyes. That was the difference. Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too – even when you’re in the dark. Even when you’re falling."

14.  "Tapes, like photographs and videos, are a desperate attempt to steal something from death’s suitcase."

15.  "We all need teachers in our lives."

16.   "A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops."

17.  "To know you are going to die, and to be prepared for it at any time. That’s better. That way you can actually be more involved in your life while you’re living."

18.  "Once you learn how to die. You learn how to live."

19.  "If you accept that you can die at any time – then you might not as be ambitious as you are."

20.  "Don’t cling to things, because everything is impermanent."

21.  "If you don’t hold back on the emotions – if you don’t allow yourself to go all the way through  them – you can never get to being detached, you’re too busy being afraid. You’re afraid of the pain, your afraid of the grief. You’re afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails."

22.  "I don’t want to leave the world in a state of fright. I want to know what’s happening, accept it, get to a peaceful place, and let go."

23.  "Wealth do not buy happiness and contentment."

24.  He was giving as an adult and taking as a child.

25.  "Aging is not just decay. It’s growth. It’s more than the negative that you’re going to die. It’s also the positive  that you understand you’re going to die, and that you live a better life because of it."

26.  "You have to find what is good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now."

27.  "On Aging: How can I be envious of where you are – when I’ve been there myself?"

28.  "Love is how to stay alive, even after you are gone."

29.  "I believe in being fully present."

30.  "Friend are great, but friends are not going to be here on a night when you are coughing and can’t sleep and someone has to sit up all night with you, comfort you, try to be helpful."

31. "Rules on marriage: If you don’t respect the other person, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don’t know how to compromise, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. If you can’t talk openly about what goes on between you, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don’t have a common set of values in life. You’re gonna have a lot of trouble. Your values must be alike. And the greatest of those values? Your belief in the importance of marriage."

32.  "I think marriage is a very important thing to do, and you’re missing a hell of a lot if you don’t try it. Love each other or perish."

33.  "How much time we spend trying to shape our bodies, lifting weights, crunching sit-ups, and in the end, nature takes it away from us anyhow."

34.  "People are only mean when they are threatened. When we get threatened, you start looking out only for yourself."

35.  "Every society has its own problems. The way to do it, I think isn’t to run away. You have to work at creating your own culture. No matter how we live, the biggest defect  we human beings have is our shortsightedness. We don’t see what we could be.  We should be looking at our potential, stretching ourselves into something we can become."

36.  "If we saw each other as more alike, we might be eager to join in one big human family in this world, and to care about that family the way we care about our own."

37.  "In the beginning of life, when we are infants, we need others to survive, right? And at the end of life, when you get like me, you need others to survive, right? But here’s the secret: in between, we need others as well."

38.  "Don’t let go too soon, but don’t hang on too long."

39.  "If we know in the end, that we can ultimately have that peace with dying, then we can finally do the really hard thing: Make peace with the living."

40.  "As long as we can love each other, and remember the feeling of love we had, we can die without ever really going away."

41.  "Death ends a life, not a relationship."

42.  "You’re not a wave. You are part of the ocean."

- Tuesdays with Morrie